You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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