Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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