the day after is always just damage control
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
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No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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