it was like his penis was on wheels.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
