At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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