I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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