Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I am not eating basil off your cock
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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