I'm laying in your front yard are you home
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
