i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
