apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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