I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize