5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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