he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize