i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
