I met the friendliest cop last night
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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