if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I want to fling myself into the sun
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
