My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Randomize
