Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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