i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Randomize
