I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I just gift wrapped bread.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize