I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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