There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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