make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
We got so high we made milksteak
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
