I'm drive I can fine osifer
i think i have two assholes
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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