I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
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