i would punch a child for taco bell
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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