so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I am one with the molecules
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
