Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize
