You really coming over, don't trick.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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