Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
God I need to hump something, right now.
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