i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.