he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
