there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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