So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
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Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
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Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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