we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
