he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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