I could have mohawked her pubes.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize