Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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