the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
