"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
