Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
