He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
