I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
