You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
