Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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