ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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