I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i just google imaged poop.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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