Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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