If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
