I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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