I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
